May 2009
30/05/2009 — You feel strange. You never felt this way before. You don’t ever wanna stop. When your there you don’t want to stop and when you leave you want to be back. You can’t describe how you feel. You say something that you’ve debated whether or not to say. You don’t care about the response. All you want to do is smile like a jackass. All you want to do is stare. Admire. You’re elated. You’re happy. You want to understand but, its beyond you. A single word comes to mind. Is it for real? You’re scared of the complications that come with this. You’re scared to death and you want to take it back. But… You don’t.
If this is you, then you and I are very much alike.
27/05/2009— I bet they say she can do better, and she probably can. Why she stays is beyond me. I can’t do any better, I can’t ask for more, she can, and she deserves more but, I’m damn glad to be where I am, and I’d like to think she feels the same way. But, you never know. I could be wrong. At least I know I’m dreaming. We all have to wake up sometime. Let’s hope it will be a while before its all over.
That what? That life is hectic.” —Jason “Inspectah Deck” Hunter
26/05/2009 — Religion Class; my teacher throws a huge rant. Mentions something about some kids not having support at home from their parents. Stuck a chord with me. It redminded me of this person, who i care about quite dearly, telling me that no one really cared about their grades. I emphasized that I do but, not to do well because of me but, for themself. I hope I can continue to help inspire and support my loved ones. Its the little things that make the most impact. I gotta keep doing little things. We all need to keep doing little things.
20:59
24/05/2009—Music has the power to bring the world together and express the deepest emotions words cannot convey. Need a new tool to convey these emotions. A bass guitar sounds like the weapon of choice.
23/05/2009—The essence of combat is a spectacle which must be admired and respected. Men gather to witness human heart and strength at it’s finest. Only through the violence and terror we can see the heart and nobility of mankind and his inner warrior.
Nature is a fruitfull and loving mother. She offers her hair and what results is deep spiritual experience. Abuse of nature can lead to destruction of the body. We must respect nature and not take advantage of her kindness. Her gifts calm the mind and make the mere human one with the ground he walks on.
25/05/2009—Wonderland Trip reveals the power of euphoria and adrenaline on the body. The power the physical world and its forces are beyond comprehension and we have only scractched the surface of its power.
21:26
25/05/2009— Can’t tell the whole story. Somethings must stay personal. She is hot and cold at times. So am I. Our likeness is perhaps, our own weakeness. I do not know love so how can I know when it has found me? My desire drives me with unparalled force and neither I nor, her halt this force. Where can this lead? Forever does not exist but, never sometimes does. I’m not who I am, and I am not enough. She is not who thought but, I need no more than she. I did not expect but, I find discomfort in her majesty. It rings true, that too much of anything is a bad thing. I if I did not know then I would not feel. Ignorance is bliss.
my poison, my antidote.
my question, my answer.
my pain, my pleasure.
Only with pain there can be pleasure
Only with sorrow there can be joy.
My name is Dean Joson.
Nuff said =D